Wednesday, February 9, 2011

Go. Onward. Passionately.

“Turn your face to the sun and the shadows fall behind you”

      Maori Proverb (mmmmmm.......New Zealand)

February is going fast.Ten days until I am at the starting line for 24 OP in Tucson. Arizona Trail GPX file is loaded. Maps and mileage cues ready. UPS delivered 1.5 lbs of Montbell warmth last weekend. The seatpost bag seems to be working fine after a couple of shorter rides. I am craving the adventure of soloing a bunch of the AZ Trail, but am really wishing I had a shuttle person that would make the logistics easier. Brother is a no go. :(

More AZ trail and a Chicago Basin trip in the works in early March if avvy danger returns to minimal with good weather. Eolus is calling once again. This only fuels the fire.

The hardest part of all this is the financial part. In a way, however, it puts my back against the wall as mentioned in my earlier post No Recipe. I am scraping by, but it drives me more. It gets my butt off the couch on those dreary, cold days. It motivates me to keep a good attitude while working until 3am. It simplifies my world in a way.

I know the "shadows" that lurk (largely financial worries) in this journey will fall behind.The sun is out and my face is illuminated in its brilliance. The deep passion that stirs within feels wild, free, reckless and vibrant. My journey to find the life I want is fueled by this passion I have known since birth. A passion that defines me...drives me, tortures me, excites me and is undeniably....Me.

There is a desire deep within each of us, in the deep center of ourselves that we call our heart. We were born with it, it is never completely satisfied, and it never dies. We are often unaware of it, but it is always awake...Our true identity, our reason for being, is to be found in this desire.                    
                                Gerald May The Awakened Heart

Blue Lakes/Ridgway Hut Trip, Christmas 2009

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